Suffering for the Holidays, with the Best of the Ancients
But it can still be good.
Holiday greetings to all of you - and in particular Merry Christmas to all who are celebrating it.
This is a time many people feel lonely. If that's you, cheer up and work at it, and if you do, chances are it will be better next year. It's also just as common to be surrounded by people and groan about who you are "stuck with."
If that is you, take some comfort, because chances are you don't have it as bad as Lucullus did.
The great Roman commander, who humbled Mithridates and Armenia, had a terrible family life. His father was prosecuted for extorting provincials in Sicily, and forced into exile when Lucullus was still young; his mother, a Metella, had a reputation for infidelity.
Lucullus didn't entirely succeed in breaking the cycle: while he was more successful in his career than his dad, his first wife, Clodia, was notoriously unfaithful to him. While he was conducting his glorious campaigns, Lucullus would get letters from friends back home telling of her exploits around the bedrooms of Rome - such as with the poet Catullus. You can imagine it took a lot of the pleasure out of his work.
His brother in law, Clodius, a younger man, rubbed salt in the wound: while a junior officer (quaestor) in Lucullus' army, Clodius fomented discontent among the troops and helped orchestrate a mutiny, which ended up terminating Lucullus' command.
Lucullus divorced Clodia, then tried again - this time with a girl from more respectable family, Servilia - Cato's sister. But Servilia was just as bad, in all the ways that counted. Lucullus eventually divorced her too.
How many holidays did Lucullus spend irritated and depressed, wishing he had made different choices, while other people seemed so happy?
So, reflecting on this, I'm trying to be grateful for what I have.
And despite his personal miseries, Lucullus did great services for the Roman state, and was a patron to countless poets, artists, and artisans. He was most famous in his day for sculpting a massive garden near the Campus Martius (where the Spanish Steps are now), in the grand Persian style that he learned while in the East. It was enjoyed by generations of Romans after him.
So I encourage you with this thought, as I encourage myself: even if you do face terrible suffering, your life can have immense meaning that may be hard to foresee.
A couple of tweets I did on Lucullus this week:
How a nap saved western civilization:
https://twitter.com/costofglory/status/1737854278855999708
How your failures can fuel your children:
https://twitter.com/costofglory/status/1737110139763834987
Lucullus part 3 will be coming out right after the new year.
Here's a link to part 2 meanwhile:
All best,
Alex
PS: Applications are open for our Rome Retreat, July 2024. We’ve already received a number, and spaces are limited!
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